Hold my paw

Maple, our lovely Vizsla, had some surgery to remove a tumour from the base of her tail a few days ago. We thought she would lose her tail, but the vet managed to keep it, for now. She should be fine, but the recovery includes keeping her as quiet and calm as possible for 2 weeks. Try telling a dog not to wag her tail, or not to sit because it compresses the stitches and makes them bleed! An impossible task.

What she needs is a person (let's be honest, me) to sit beside her. All the time. It is as simple and as complicated as that. It has become a lesson in letting go of what doesn't matter, and a reminder that all things temporary.

Tending to a dog is different to tending to humans in need. But many of the same things apply. We hone our focus down to what is essential. We prioritise what is needed over what is wanted. And we show up. We hold their hand (or paw), so they know we love them.

I have found, in a weird way, that it is almost like a meditation. I cannot multi-task. I am consciously paying attention to her needs, and doing the few things I can as I sit alongside her. All the jobs I do, all the rushing around, all the overthinking, stops. I am simply here, being present, and grateful to have this time to give to her.

Often it takes illness - our own, or others - to engage this process of honed focus on what really matters. Learning to sit with what is can be difficult, especially if, like me, you are a problem solving, in-charge kind of person. Sitting meditation can be a useful practice for this, because there may be discomfort - in the knees, the back, an itch that wants scratching, fear, worry, boredom or resentment - but you simply sit with what comes up, figure out how to be okay with it, and eventually it passes. Or not. Your only job is to stay, even when it gets uncomfortable.

The human condition is to seek comfort and avoid discomfort. And this includes the disruption of regular life when real life, actual life, needs attending to.

All we have is this moment. And this moment. Sometimes we get to do all the things we want to. Other times, we need to sit, hold a paw, and simply be present. It is as simple and as complicated as that.

With love,

Amanda and Maple xx